Caring, Compassion, Courage, Kindness, Affection, Romance, Intimacy, Beauty, Joy, Sorrow, Loss (fill in the blank)
I have a little plaque in my entry hall that says: “Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. It’s about learning to dance in the rain.” I like to believe we are learning together.
Dear Friends & Fellow Rascals of All Ages … Here we are moving quickly toward the end of February … hanging on to winter, hoping for spring, trying to keep up with what’s going on in the world and doing what we can to make things better. In addition to February honoring Black History (and what better time to say Goodbye to the iconic Reverend Jesse Jackson) and the month’s increasingly over-commercialization of Valentines Day, this week celebrated not only the Chinese New Year ushering in the Fire Horse, but the start of both the sacred month of Ramadan and the 40-day Christian observance of Lent in preparation for Easter. I did not expect to find a quote from Howard Thurman that spoke to all of them, but here it is.
So … for now, let’s choose Love and stay with the moments of our high resolve. As Rosemerry Trommer says, “It saves us from thirsting in the desert of our lives, but only if we save it first by choosing it.” If nothing else grabs your attention here, please gift yourself with two&ahalf minutes to sing along with Dionne Warwick, a sweet song from 60 years ago; one that never gets old … and then read Rosemerry’s poem.
On a Day When the World Has Its Way With Me
by Rosemerry Wahtola TrommerLike every other day, today
it is apparent that only love
will save us. Not in the grandiose
abstract way, but in the alarming
specific way. As in forgiveness, now.
As in choosing to hug instead
of fighting back. As in taking
three deep breaths before saying
something we regret. It saves us
from thirsting in the desert of our lives,
but only if we save it first by
choosing it, now in this moment
of angry words, now in this moment
of clenched thoughts, now in
this moment when we’d rather
taste venom but instead, we
pour love into our cup and
bring it to our lips and drink
and drink until once again
it is only love that makes sense,
only love that refills the cup.
In addition to reading Thom Hartmann’s regular ‘Hartmann Report”, I often check in on his “Wisdom School: What it Means to be Human.” I found his post of February 4th especially enriching. “What Did Childhood Teach Us Before Productivity Trained it Out of Us?” Here Hartmann explores how growing up becomes a process of abandoning wonder – and why that loss leaves many adults feeling empty. Here’s what caught my attention.
Children don’t move through the world with a checklist: they wander, pause, and often fixate on odd details. They follow curiosity without asking whether it’ll be useful later. Time stretches for them not because they’re inefficient, but because they’re present. (Personal Note: For some of us who live long enough, this business of being present rather than efficient seems to be finding its way back)
Our modern productivity culture, driven by the demands of our economic overlords and media, teaches us to see this as waste.
Very early, we begin training children out of their natural rhythms. We reward sitting still over moving, answers over questions, and speed over exploration. We praise them for finishing quickly and gently shame them for drifting off. Daydreaming becomes a problem to solve or medicate into non-existence as wandering attention becomes something to correct.
By adulthood, most of us have internalized this terrible lesson. We measure our days by our outputs. We evaluate our worth by what we’ve completed, not by what we’ve noticed or experienced. We feel vaguely guilty when we’re not producing something that can be pointed to, counted, or justified.
In the process, something essential gets eroded. (Personal Note: We stop loving ourself for who we are)
Children approach the world as a place to be explored, not conquered. They touch things, dismantle things, ask questions that don’t lead anywhere obvious. They aren’t interested in optimization. They are, instead, interested in understanding. When they repeat an action again and again, it’s rarely because they’re trying to perfect it. It’s because repetition itself is teaching them something they can’t yet name.
This mode of engagement builds a different kind of intelligence. It cultivates intuition, pattern recognition, emotional attunement, and a sense of connection that doesn’t depend on achievement. It allows meaning to emerge rather than be extracted.
Hartmann goes on to say: Productivity, by contrast, is goal-driven. It asks what something is for before it asks what it is. It prioritizes efficiency over intimacy. It encourages us to skim rather than sink in, to move on quickly once a task is complete. And here’s where I have to stop, lest I end up printing out the whole piece. Read it all here if you’d like.
Speaking of Black History month, you might enjoy taking a look at this enlightening video with Heather Cox Richardson (talking) and Liza Donnelly (drawing) a story about Frederick Douglass’s Valentines Day birthday.
Not wanting to leave out any Soup Lovers who might be perusing this page, here’s my recipe for “Interesting Times Lunar New Year Soup.”
And here’s a little Valentine offering from Elizabeth Nelson, best known on Substack as The 26th Avenue Poet. You can find more of her delightfully thoughtful poetry here.
CHINESE RESTAURANTS AND MOVIE THEATERS
It works in late December, I am promised by friends
who know, so why not in the midst of February?
Brush past some mylar hearts in the lobby
of the Roxie or the Kowloon Palace,
wait till the kung pao chicken is plated
or the first trailer flashes up, and just like that
today is simply a day, yours as much as anyone’s,
even if you have no sweetheart or are no sweetheart,
or are allergic to chocolate or prefer a spray of rosemary
to any dozen roses, even if your heart
is its own shape, not so much trimmed with lace
as frayed around the edges — still, here, a grateful distance
from the clamor of merchants and true believers,
the One-Plus-Ones entangled in each other’s gaze,
here while you chopstick-fumble wicked peppers
to one side of the plate or laugh in surprise
at a plot twist, here you can be One, not Two-Minus-One,
alone in company with other Ones at other tables, sprawled
in other rows, exchanging without word or glance
the love-gift of agreement that this need not be Our Day
but just the day it is, no frills or decorations called for,
except maybe an extra slip inside the fortune cookie.
Or not. A single fortune is enough. A single fortune is fine.
And Last, but definitely not Least … a tender reminder that Love is Love is Love and that Love does not die. Whether it be Love of Self, of partner, of family, neighbor, community, country, Life itself or God … whatever else may be happening, Love is Love is Love. If you haven’t yet seen or heard about the incredible documentary “Come See Me in the Good Light”, a powerfully beautiful diary of the final year of the amazing poet Andrea Gibson’s life with their wife and fellow poet, Megan Falley, please accept this video as my Valentine gift to you.
A Stunning Portrait of Poet Andrea Gibson’s Final Year … watch on PBS Amanpour & Company
Until next time, do sing & dance a little every day, but especially … Love Much!
Sulima
from “Valentine’s Day Cards for Puritans” by Rusty Blazenhoff
Buying me an occasional coffee helps me keep these stories coming … and gives me one less reason to cross my fingers when my Social Security payment is due!
